I have been officially back in school since June 2011. I have earned more gray hairs, more wrinkles and more knowledge than ever! Right now I am struggling, like I have ever semester since I started, with the tug between perfection and progression. You see, I have made straight A's in my endeavors thus far and that is something that I am extremely proud of. Sometimes though I feel I put too much pressure on myself, and in turn of transference, on those around me, to be perfect. I have been really thinking about my drive for perfection and where it originates from.

 There is a drive in me to prove to myself that I am good enough. Good enough to be a mom, a student, a wife, a person. I feel a need to show all of those mean people of my younger days and those mean people of my present days that I am a great person.

 Why do I feel this drive? I think it is because I care. I care about mean people gaining so much from this world, while nice people tend to get trampled and walked upon. I care about mean people feeling they have a right to make others feel bad to make themselves feel better, not caring whom they have hurt. I care about mean people making this world a hurtful place. My conclusion? I need to quit caring.

 Not really. However, I do need to change what I care about. I can longer give an ounce of care to those people who feel a need to be snippy, allow people to hurt others, walk on other people's feelings and to laugh and smile at others pains.

 My focus needs to be on caring about those people who smile when they walk by you, even if they don't know you. I need to care about those people who will lend you a quarter at the vending machine when they see you rifling through your change to find one. I need to care about people who will ask you if you are okay when they see the light isn't there in your eyes.

 I need to care for those who care.